Starting 2019 from rock bottom

**Alexander** · Views: 3852 | 01-02-2019

Nobody will probably read this, but I wanted to talk about things anyways.

After grade 12 graduation, I was 17, lived on my own, and had a steady job. Things were going well.

When I was 18, I spent most of my free time experimenting with drugs, mainly psychedelics. For a long time I did nothing but weed, but eventually I tried mushrooms and ecstasy, (which in all honesty weren't that bad) it wasn't really effecting my life until I started doing LSD.

Before I got into the LSD, I had a steady job, and was in fantastic shape, I weighed about 180lb, was working out nearly every day, I did the WHM breathing exercises, took cold showers, I would literally walk to work in a t-shirt in the middle of minus 30 - 40c weather. I felt good!

But for some reason I still felt I was lacking inside, so that's why I did drugs, to fill a small void inside of me, at first I thought these drugs were "enhancing my spirituality" but little did I know my entire life would be flipped upside down.

Meanwhile I was attempting to make a shopify store and I was really hyped about it, after I came home from work id spend all my time on my computer, unless doing drugs, obsessing over the idea that I was going to become extremely wealthy, after weeks of doing Acid and obsessing over my computer I became extremely erratic; i was connecting things in an unhealthy way... drawing out weird shapes, equations, and on my computer I had a giant text document with thousands of lines of equations involving words and numbers, my shopify store never made any money and in the midst of my craziness I had posted an ad on Facebook that was continuously running for said shopify store.

It didn't take long before I started posting erratically on Facebook, my friends and family watched as I went insane. I thought i had found the cure to cancer, and I thought time travel was real... I literally thought all fiction was another dimension that existed, i hallucinated Yoda from star wars in my closet one night (lmfao)

Not long after I started posting images and text on Facebook, I had shown up to work late twice, and the second time I showed up late I had a very strong case of drug induced mania, and psychosis -- or at least thats what i was diagnosed with. My boss thought i was still high from Acid, as I admitted to doing it when he called me into his office. I had been working there since high-school and I had never had a problem. My boss basically told me to get my shit together and come back to work when I wasn't fucked up.

Not even a day later I was in a hospital being looked at by a doctor and thats when I was diagnosed with drug induced mania, psychosis and possible schizophrenia. i was at the hospital for a couple of days, my mother and father were extremely worried about me and there was nothing they could do for me at the hospital so i was sent to a real mental hospital where I spent give or take a month, at this time my mind was falling apart.

After a long 30 some days, of doing nothing but eating, sleeping and trying to pass time, and smoking cigarettes, I was out of the mental hospital, and prescribed anti psychotics.

I talked to my boss, and someone had filled my position in my time away and he basically said they didn't need me anymore.

I was extremely depressed, and it got worse when I went to go on my computer. the ad was still running on Facebook and it had cost be about $5k. In my state i had for some reason also changed my email password and had lost access to it. I was still a bit loopy and I ended up moving out of my apartment and moved in with my grandparents for my own good.

That's where I live now, I'm 19 now, and I've been stuck in a depression, gained weight, started smoking, and the gym has closed in my town so I don't work out. I now weigh 220lb. I have put out resumes, looked for employment, which has only so far been temporary summer jobs, but now that it's winter I am completely out of work. it has been impossible to find a job.

So here I am on edollarearn.com, I originally found the website whilst looking for the wim hof method online, prior to my incident. But remembered it hosting information and files based on earning money online, exactly as the name entails.

I have vaguely tried e-commerce, which didnt work out for me well. But I'm desperately looking for employment, I just want to know if anyone out there has a method that works, that isn't a scam.

I am now VIP so there's lots of different programs out there with information but I just don't know which one I should try.

So if anybody here has any tips or advice for me, it would be much appreciated.